My son. My boy. My favorite little man. My Mr. Man. My biggest ever smiler. There is nothing I would not do for you.
Spencer, for you, I have given up dairy, cow protein (meat and milk, very kosher of me), whey and casein. I miss it. I miss food. I daydream about my first meal once you are able to process dairy again. I pin recipes on pinterest, rip them out of magazines, and bookmark them on my computer. And I do it for you. And I am happy to. OK, not happy happy, but I do it and I don’t regret it. I could stop. I could eat cheese right now. mmm…. cheese… cream cheese… nachos…. ice cream…. any of the tons of foods that had whey and casein hidden into the ingredient list…. but I won’t for you. And for me. It is too important to me to keep nursing you. I would rather be able to nurse you than eat cheese. And this is a big statement
But there is one thing I simply cannot do for you. I WILL not do for you. Spencer, today I bought dairy free cheese. And I opened it this evening, and Spencer, as much as I love you, I can’t do it. I did not eat it. I couldn’t. But I did touch it to my lips and tongue (briefly) and frankly that was enough for me.
My darling boy, I will do anything for you, but please don’t ask me to eat that ever again! I would rather be dairy free than try to fake it by eating that stuff.